Tuesday, March 9, 2010

What was I thinking??

So people who know me well will be shocked by the following news.


this takes me so far out of my comfort zone that my stomach hurts already and I still have almost 3 weeks until I talk.

In high school I told my bishop after almost passing out while giving my talk that I would never speak in church again until my brother went on a mission. So unless I missed the memo that my brother was going on a mission...or that my old bishop never attached the memo about me not speaking in church again, I am giving a talk.
And in true Michelle Blogging Form here is my Top 10 reasons why talking in church stresses me out. (this is for you erin)

1. I shake like a leaf and almost get sick when i have to pray in Sacrament
2. I seriously like to get to church early to sit in the back
3. I don't like a lot of people looking at me
4. I almost pass out when i have to look at everyone else
5. I will have hives from the stress of it the morining of.
6. Seriously we are never to church on time (maybe this is a ploy to get us there on time.)
7. I cry
8. I have this huge fear of passing out while people are looking at me.
9. I tend to make awkward jokes thinking its hiding my fear when really its not
10. I invision having to give said talk with Sophie on my hip
11. The topic "Leaning on the Savior" is definatly a topic that will make me cry
12 i don't do well sharing personal experiences with others around me...its hard to do so even with the ones I love let alone the whole ward
13. lets go back to the fact I cry
14. I have this huge fear that i will get done giving my talk and realise that i have a button on my shirt undone, or a big lovely sticky kids hand print on me
15. I will not be able to eat for the next 3 weeks cause i will be worried about throwing it up while giving a talk
16. I really don't like being the center of attention (which has been a huge struggle seeing as I am a mom of triplets and we kinda stick out).

Okay so my list is longer then 10 items and the sad thing is I could keep going. I am sure I will make it through it. If you are from our ward and are reading this post maybe you can all wear blindfolds that day so that its less people looking at me...better yet I should where the blindfold, but that would lead to whole bunch of other complications cause I don't read brail and I can't memorize a whole talk any more....


1 comment:

Erin said...

thanks for the list and just to let you know that you are not alone back in jan. we had to talk in church we have been in the ward for over a year and nobody knew us and i wanted to keep it that way but we said yes and i had to talk first i think that my leg was shaking so hard the everyone could tell jesse said he didn't even notice but i think he was just being nice. and then you have to deal with the people coming up to you after saying what a good job you did, let not lie just don't say anything.